Lesson's Learned From Grandma's--Finished!

Enduring to the End

Doctrine and Covenants 50:5

But blessed are they who are faithful and endure, whether in life or in death, for they shall inherit eternal life.

One thing that could be said for all of my Grandmothers is that each one of them endured, and endured well to the end. I watched my Grandma Dee Dee continue to serve as ward organist, as a visiting teacher, and in the Daughters of the Utah Pioneers organization right up until she had to be moved from her home and into a care center. My Grandma Emmy was a wonderful Relief Society, Primary and Sunday School teacher. She continued to teach and lead her family as long as she possibly could. My Grandma Moon, despite all of her physical restrictions remained positive and loved and served her family her entire life. Each one of these women were dedicated to their families, their Heavenly Father, their Savior and his church for as long as her bodies and minds were able. I will forever be grateful to be their granddaughter and to have been loved and influenced by every one of them. I look forward to being with them again some day.

Grandma Emmy Cont...

Worth the Wait

Everywhere in nature we are taught the lessons of patience and waiting. We want things a long time before we get them, and the fact that we wanted them a long time makes them all the more precious when they come.

President Joseph F. Smith

Grandma Emmy met Grandpa Sollie when she was just 15 years old. She was at a basketball game and he was a referee. She saw him, she liked him, and then she tripped him to get his attention. It worked and they began courting. Grandpa was 7 years older than Grandma so they had a bit of a wait until she was old enough to marry. They were married about 6 years later by President Harold B. Lee in her parents’ home. Grandma and Grandpa were not of the same faith but Grandma hoped her Sollie would one day become a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints and that they could be sealed together for eternity in the Temple. Grandpa did eventually join the church. Grandma waited 16 years for Grandpa to take her to the Temple. They were sealed as a family in the Salt Lake Temple with their 4 sons and 2 daughters. Just a few years later Grandpa passed away. She was so grateful that her marriage was not just for this life, but forever. Grandma then had the longest wait of her life ahead of her. A widow at just 39 years old, she was left to raise 6 children on her own—although she knew she was never alone. Her Heavenly Father and Savior Jesus Christ were there to help her. Grandma never dated or even looked at another man. She told me several times she couldn’t imagine ever being with anyone but Grandpa. On February 21, 2005 at 86 years old Grandma was reunited with her Sollie. I’m sure it was a wonderful reunion and completely worth the wait.

Grandma Emmy...cont.

Seek Wisdom

Proverbs 4:7

Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom: and with all thy getting get understanding.

Grandma Emmy learned from each person she associated with and many of the “Pearls of Wisdom” she gathered on life’s journey were posted on her fridge. A few that could be found there were:

“There’s no pillow quite so soft as a father’s strong shoulder” Richard L. Evans. It was accompanied by a picture of a dad with a sleepy little son on his shoulder.

“The things which the child in us loved, remain in our hearts forever” -Dr. Bond’s office (Grandma’s Dr.)

“Walk towards the light and the shadows will fall behind you” -President Thomas S. Monson

“I refuse to enter a battle of wits with an unarmed person” -Mark Sollis (Grandma’s son)

“Unhappiness is not knowing what we want and breaking our necks to get it” -Grandma Child (Grandma Emmy’s mother)

“Don’t lose faith in what you know because of what you don’t know” -Anon

“Run with patience the race that is set before us” -Anon

Grandma Emmy Cont...

Family Unity

Mosiah 18:21

And he commanded them that there should be no contention one with another, but that they should look forward with one eye, having one faith and one baptism, having their hearts knit together in unity and in love one towards another.

When I was just 6 or 7 years old my parents and all of my aunts and uncles began building a family cabin. I have memories of spending evenings building forts and playing in the woods while my dad and uncles hammered away into the night. The cabin became a fun place to gather with family and friends. As I grew older I learned that the cabin was a dream of my Grandma Emmy’s—to have a place where all her family could be together, strengthen one another, and have fun together. Grandma Emmy mortgaged her own home to provide financing for the cabin. The cabin continues to bless Grandma’s children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren. I am at the cabin as I type this, enjoying a fun vacation with Kevin and our kids. If asked what was most important to my Grandma Emmy, I would say without hesitation, that it was her faith and her family. She understood what mattered most and her life reflected it in the way she lived every single day.

Cousins Camp 2011

My parents grand kids gathered at the family cabin for our annual cousins camp!

Grandma Emmy Cont...

Be Kind

D&C4:6

Remember faith, virtue, knowledge, temperance, patience, brotherly kindness, godliness, charity, humility, diligence.

Grandma Emmy had a fun house! A great big backyard where we had fun family picnics on the 24^th of July. The inside wasn’t very big but we somehow managed to fit the entire family into her basement for Christmas parties and Thanksgiving. She had stairs leading to the basement that made a couple of turns, making them very fun to play on. There was a huge chalkboard on one of the basement walls where we played school for hours. Grandma had a laundry shoot, perfect size for a child to fit through…a great game, down the shoot, up the stairs and then back down the shoot again. Grandma had a pool table that took up a big portion of the main room in the basement, although I never remember anyone playing pool. It was usually covered with a tablecloth and covered with tons of good food. The best part of her entire house was the Christmas tree in the basement. She kept it up all year round as a reminder of the true meaning of Christmas and to be kind and Christ like all the year through.

Grandma Emmy Cont...

(Our oldest, Jackson with his Great Grandma Emmy)

The Gift of Motherhood

The Family:A Proclamation to the World, Paragraph 7

The family is ordained of God…Happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when founded upon the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ. Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities. By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children. In these sacred responsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners.

I can remember going to visit Grandma Emmy as a young mother. I had just graduated from college and had my first son, Jackson. Kevin was still in college and working 3 jobs so that I could be home with our baby. Grandma gave me some advice that I’ve never forgotten. She talked to me about the blessing of raising children and of being a mother. She spoke of the importance of mothers raising their children and that when times are tough, it’s ok to live on peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, if that’s what it takes to be home with the children. I’ve thought about that conversation often over the years, especially through hard times when I wondered how we would ever make ends meet with just one breadwinner. Every time I make peanut butter and jelly sandwiches I think of Grandma.

Grandma Emmy Cont...

Keep on Sweethearting

Doctrine and Covenants 25:14

Continue in the spirit of meekness, and beware of pride. Let thy soul delight in thy husband, and the glory which shall come upon him.

Although I never knew my Grandpa Sollie, he and my Grandma Emmy set a wonderful example of an eternal marriage. Grandma was devoted to Grandpa in his life and in his death in the way she loved, served and respected him. I always knew of the deep love Grandma had for her husband. Their union was eternal and she knew it with all her heart. When each of her grandkids got engaged it was tradition to take our fiancés to visit grandma and tell her of our announcement. She would often be one of the firsts to see the engagement ring and give her congratulations. Grandma would share stories of her and Grandpa, of their love for each other and for the Savior. She talked of the joys and the sorrows that marriage will bring, “but all are wonderful when you work through it together”. She always gave the best advice, “Keep the Savior at the center of your marriage, and don’t ever stop sweethearting!” Grandma used to often tell me that when she finally got to see Grandpa Sollie again she was going to sing to him, “Kiss me once and kiss me twice and kiss me once again, it’s been a long, long time!” I have no doubt that she did sing that to him and that they are in the spirit world sweethearting every single day.

Grandma Emmy...Cont.

Personal Revelation

D&C 42:61

If thou shalt ask, thou shalt receive revelation upon revelation, knowledge upon knowledge, that thou mayest know the mysteries and peaceable things—that which bringeth joy, that which bringeth life eternal.”

One afternoon Grandma Emmy was folding laundry when she heard a voice that said, “Emma, your life will never be the same”. She dropped the shirt that she was hanging back into the laundry basket, in complete shock. Then the phone rang, it was the hospital telling her Sollie had collapsed and to come and get him. That was the beginning of the brain tumor. This story reminds me that God knows each of His children. He will communicate with us if we let Him. He warns us, He reminds us, He shows us, and He helps us. God was aware of Grandma Emmy and what was about to happen to her and her family. He let her know He was there and He never left her alone.

Trust in the Lord with All thy Heart

Proverbs 3:5,6

Trust in the Lord with all thine heart, and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.

Grandpa eventually lapsed into a coma for 4 days in his home. When he awoke he sat up and said, “I have been to a better place but I didn’t like it as well because you and the children were not there”. He went on to say, “The lot is let, the die is cast, and there is no turning back”. He then went back into a coma for another day. Grandma had been up all night with him and that morning her brothers came to give him a blessing. They asked Grandma, “What do you want us to say?” To that she replied, “I don’t know, you should know, you hold the priesthood!” Then Grandma walked around the bed and sat by Grandpa Sollie. He was lying so still but his head was tilted toward her. She asked him, “What should they say?” Then Grandpa opened his eyes, looked at Grandma with his eyes full of love, then shut them, sighed peacefully, and then he was gone. Grandma later said, “God made the decision. No prayer was needed, his mission was complete.”

Grandma Emmy

Did You Think to Pray?

2Nephi 32:9

But behold, I say unto you that ye must pray always, and not faint that ye must not perform any thing unto the Lord save in the first place ye shall pray unto the Father in the name of Christ, that he will consecrate thy performance unto thee that thy performance my be for the welfare of thy soul

When Grandma Emmy and Grandpa Sollie were on their honeymoon, Grandma came out of the bathroom ready for her first night with Grandpa, thinking they would start their marriage with prayer. She was surprised to find that Grandpa was already in bed. Grandma asked, “Sollie aren’t we going to pray?” and Grandpa replied, “What’s the purpose, they only hit the ceiling anyway”. Grandma was determined never to cry to a man to get her way so she stood tall and said, “Well, I’m glad I kept some money for a phone call home.” She went back into the bathroom and quickly realized she had nothing to change into so she put her bathrobe over her pajamas. Upon entering the bedroom she found Grandpa Sollie sitting at the edge of the bed. He said, “Emma that will never happen again”. The two of them prayed together that night and continued to pray throughout their marriage, never missed.

Everything has its Purpose

Doctrine and Covenants 64:32-33

But all things must come to pass in their time. Wherefore, be not weary in well-doing, for ye are laying the foundation of a great work. And out of small things proceedeth that which is great.

Grandpa Sollie was drafted into the U.S.Navy as an apprentice seaman. Grandpa and Grandma thought he would be exempt because he had a knee injury and two children, but it was WWII and men were needed. He went off to boot camp at Farragut, Idaho for 12 weeks before leaving for the war. Grandpa Sollie was away from Grandma Emmy and their 2 small children, Carol and David, for about 2 years. When Grandma speaks of that time of life it is only with gratitude and joy. It was during Grandpa’s time at boot camp that he attended the meetings of various churches. Grandpa was not a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints at that time. In fact all of his family were baptized into the Episcopalian Church. When he came home on leave he asked to be baptized and confirmed a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. He was baptized and confirmed before leaving for war and also ordained to the office of a Priest so he could officiate in the Sacrament wherever he was in the war. He could renew his covenants with his Heavenly Father no matter where he was on Sunday. His experiences away from home at boot camp brought a change to his heart. Grandma had been a faithful member her entire life and having Sollie join her in her faith was a blessing she treasured.